Monday, May 28, 2007
"May I lend a machete to your intellectual thicket?" - Capt. Jack Sparrow
Okay, now I've seen the first 3 of the thirds (Spiderman, Shrek and Pirates of the Caribbean) with 3 to go (Ocean's 13, Bourne Ultimatum and Live Free or Die Hard - okay that's a 4th) and I still think they're worth making. I really liked most of At World's End, and there were parts that should have been trimmed a bit. Basically, here's what I think it's about (and the critics are right, it's pretty confusing): A long time ago, Davy Jones and the sea goddess Calypso fell in love. Davy Jones made a deal to live forever, but he was tasked with ferrying those who die at sea to the next world. In return he'd live forever and could set foot on land only 1 day every 10 years to be with Calypso. However, pirates who sailed the seas wanted more control and their high council entrapped Calypso in a body and was thus prevented from meeting Davy Jones on his day off, which sent him spiraling into neglecting his duties, corrupting people and imprisoning them on "The Flying Dutchman" to work off their debt. In order to kill Davy Jones, you must destroy his heart (which is kept separate from his body - like not keeping the deed to your house in your house) and then rip out your own heart and thus take his place as "The Flying Dutchman MUST have a captain. Basically, in this movie, the Dutch East India Company has possession of Davy Jones heart and thus controls the seas. The pirates will have none of this and want to get Calypso released from her mortal coil so she can smack down Davy Jones. So the 9 leaders of pirates get together and release her (which includes Jack Sparrow, so he must be fetched from the meta-physical world he's been sent to - which includes an awesome scene where he argues with all his personalities as he goes insane - Depp perfection) - but she's really pissed about being imprisoned and tries to smack down everyone. That's where the movie runs off the rails - they swirl around in a maelstrom for ages with everyone fighting back and forth and I think all the fun people survive and Davy Jones and Calypso are reunited. But this long sequence happens about 2 and half hours into the movie and is just too much, so I could be wrong. Overall, I really liked most of this movie, but I recommend renting it and fast-forwarding through the overwhelming scenes - and now you have this handy explanation in case you get confused.
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